Maybe the world will be perfect someday and people will concern themselves with only issues that are really their concerns. Until then, interracial couples will continue to go through unnecessary hostility and difficulties which should otherwise be avoided.
The work in being in an interracial relationship has not even started after you hook up on free interracial dating sites. That is just the very beginning. The rest of the work lies on your being able to overcome the unexpected difficulties which comes in this terrain.
When Everybody Automatically Has The Wrong Assumption that you are not together
When people look at you two they conclude that you have no business being together and treat you as two groups, not as the couple that you are. Sometimes you are cut off from your partner as people try to 'put you in your place'. Of course with everybody trying to be civilised and all, most of these efforts come from far down, from people's subconscious and memories which have formed a particular perception. You may not be expecting this, but you better get ready for it.
The Difficulty In Taking Couple Pictures And Selfies
This is an unexpected and maybe a funny one. The black one wants to take a picture in the sun, the white thinks it is a tough thing taking pictures in the same. Back in their climes, they take pictures under different weathers, now they just have to find a way to make it work for the both of them.
Having To Make Some Linguistic Adjustments
Sometimes a word in the one's language might mean something offensive in the other's language. It might be a word that one loves using and this might cause a little problem. If the problem is not between the couple, it will be between one of them and the other's friends or relations.
Being in an interracial relationship presents you this difficulty and you have to counter it by adjusting your language. You may be ignorant of the damage you are causing, but it is still damage all the same, and if you want that relationship to work you have to change it a bit. Some people are plain insensitive and even if you take them on a class for a century about sensitivity they will never learn.
Some people are plain insensitive and even if you take them on a class for a century about sensitivity they will never learn. Sometimes after hearing that you are married to an Asian, they go "I do not really see anything special about Asians" and all other such balderdash.
The Jokes About Your Race That You Have To Deal With
This is rather tiring and it may suddenly come out of the blues leaving you turning different colours in embarrassment. It may even be a harmless joke thrown in between meals. You, my friend, have to be ready and deal with it the way you deem fit. You can tell them you do not like it or you ignore it.
The discomfort that comes with people guessing your partner's ethnicity
This is a bit tough, as guessing right will foster friendship. But as I always tell people, when in doubt remain silent. That is my advice to people dining with an interracial couple. There is always this awkwardness that comes with people enquiring about one's partner's ethnicity with such insensitive questions like "what is he?" You can express your displeasure if you feel like it. I think it is advisable to do so.
This happens because people have already decided in their subconscious that the two different looking people cannot be together.
So when they hit on one of the couple right before the partner because they assume they must be working together or have some business together but never that they are together.
When your kids are faced with identity problems
When you have problems explaining that your kid is your kid
This one can come as a shock. In a survey interview, an Asian married to a white said he had problems when he goes to pick up his child who has the blond hair of blue eyes of the whites in America. Sometimes, people had stopped him to ask if she really was his daughter. Talk about unexpected.
When people you expect to accept you as a couple reject you while people you expect to reject you accept you.
People still get abused in public because of their choice of the person they chose to spend their lives with. This situation often comes as a shocker if you were not expecting it.
Indeed you will probably not be expecting it. Most folks are living with pretence while they burn with anger and loathing against interracial couples.
Even though incidents of interracial couples being attacked on the streets are almost inexistent now, they still happen. You may just be unlucky enough to be an unsuspecting victim.
Most of these unexpected difficulties will not really matter much to you when you assure yourselves that it your lives after all and there is no one that will live it for you but yourselves. In the end it is the both of you against the world, and together you will weather the storm and not regret a moment.